


I'll Always Look Out For You

by Ash2411



Series: Yet [1]
Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Bellarke, F/M, Ficlets, Fluff, one shots, prompts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-26
Updated: 2016-07-26
Packaged: 2018-07-27 00:05:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,236
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7595566
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ash2411/pseuds/Ash2411
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is a part of my "Yet" series. "Yet" is basically a series of short Bellarke ficlets and one shots inspired by prompts sent to me on Tumblr. </p>
<p>This work takes place after Luna refuses to help the Delinquents and they're forced to return to the shore.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'll Always Look Out For You

Luna was our only shot at stopping Alie, Bellamy! That’s it. We’re not going to find another nightblood. The second AI will never find another home and all of us are gong to end up exactly like everyone else trapped inside the city of light!” Clarke says heatedly. Jasper and Octavia stare at Bellamy and Clarke facing each other, both wearing expressions of distress and frustration.

“Clarke, we’ll find another way. This isn’t the end. We’ll fight Alie another way.” 

“There is no other way. You heard Raven. This is the only thing stopping all of us from turning into mindless slaves to Alie!” Clarke holds up the tin box, her eyes wild like a trapped animal. “This. Is. It. She’s all we have!” 

It’s quiet for a moment and Clarke realizes what’s she’s said. Her cheeks redden and she closes her eyes, breathing deeply. 

“Clarke, it’s an AI. I know you want it to be Lexa in there. But it’s a chip, Clarke.” Bellamy says gently. 

Clarke shakes her head and turns away from him. “You don’t understand, You’ve never lost someone you actually loved.” 

Her words are a slap in the face. “Right.” Bellamy says coldly. “I could never understand poor Clarke. The only person who’s hurting here. Because no one else here lost someone they love. I’ve neveractually loved anyone right?”

Clarke steps towards him, but he steps back from her. “I didn’t mean it.”The pain in Bellamy’s eyes hits Clarke hard.

 Bellamy feels a surge of anger and guilt and grief. It’s sharp and leaves him raw. “I don’t care.” 

“Fine. I’ll just…” Clarke can feel her throat straining painfully. “I’ll do this on my own.”

This time it’s Bellamy’s words that feel like a slap. “So much for ‘together’ right? It’s only ‘together’ when it’s something important to you. Good to know.” He stands his ground and the air between them falls thick with tension. Finally Clarke snaps under the pressure and this time it’s her turn to walk away. 

She doesn’t let herself cry until she’s out of sight, under the cover of the trees and then the tears come fast and hard. She leans against a tree and slides to the ground, looking up at the cloudy gray sky peaking through the leaves. 

It isn’t fair she thinks. She thinks of Bellamy’s words and another fresh wave of tears comes to her eyes. Clarke feels hopeless. She feels scared and unsure. Her heart is heavy with guilt and regret and for fucks’s sake she just wants it to end. She wants the constant ache of loss to stop. She wants her father back. She wants Wells back. She wants Finn. She wants Lexa….She wants her mom. She’s feels so acutely alone, sitting there in the growing darkness, the sky turning purple above her. 

She rubs at her eyes and hates herself for hurting Bellamy. He’s right- she isn’t the only one who’s lost people. She thinks of Monty, of Raven, of Octavia….And Bellamy. God, has he experienced loss. His mother is gone, he has no father to miss, and his sister can’t even grant him one glance. And Gina…Clarke feels jealousy tug at her and she hates herself for it. She is jealous of a dead girl; a girl she never knew, a girl Bellamy loved and someone who died, brutally while he was trying to rescue her. Clarke’s throat is sore from crying and she feels guilty. She has no right to be jealous. She chose to leave Bellamy- and besides they’re just friends. 

Even in her head it sounds like a lie. How is it that she can love so many people at once? How is it that she can want Lexa to be inside the chip, see her one last time, and still want to forget all about her hold Bellamy’s hand?

She looks back towards camp, but she can’t see Bellamy from here. His absence settles heavily on her chest and she tries to imagine a world without him in it. She’s shaking, because she can’t do it. Clarke tries to imagine that world, but then she realizes that there is no way she can. Because Clarke Griffin does not want to live here in this world without Bellamy Blake. He’s her best friend, her co-leader. He’s the glue that holds them all together. 

But who will hold him together? she thinks. Slowly her tears dry and her breathing evens and she feels more tired than she thinks she’s ever felt. 

She hears footsteps behind her and when she turns around, she sees Bellamy making his way towards her. He sits down next to her and rests his forearms on his knees. They sit in silence for a few moments before either of them says anything. 

“Why have we gotten so good at hurting one another?” Bellamy asks. He turns and looks at Clarke and her heart catches in her throat. 

She has no words to give him. Instead she scoots closer and rests her head against his shoulder. He hesitates, then wraps his arm around her and rests his cheek against the top of her head. “I’m so sorry, Clarke.” He breathes, his voice rough. 

Clarke burrows into him further. He smells warm and earthy and the zipper of his jacket is cold against her cheek. “I’m sorry too. I didn’t mean what I said. I know you’ve lost people too.”

“We all have.” Bellamy says gently. “I’m so sorry that you’ve had to lose so many.” 

Clarke shakes her head and closes her eyes, drawing her knees up to her chest. They fall to the side and rest against Bellamy’s. 

“You’re okay.” He says to her. “I promise. I’ll always look out for you.” 

Clarke wraps her arms around his middle, unable to hold herself back. This feeling of being close to him is intoxicating. He feels safe. They feel whole. She looks up at him and tries to count the freckles dotting his cheek and nose, but she loses count. He looks down at her and he’s all she sees. Everything else falls away and it’s just her and Bellamy. His eyes are steady on hers, but her gaze drops to his lips and she can’t pretend anymore. 

Clarke can’t pretend that this is nothing. She is dangerous. She loves him and that in and of itself feels like she’s sentencing him to death. Her tears are slow and she can’t breathe. The closeness is too much, but she wants to fold into it. 

Bellamy pushes her hair away from her face and rubs his thumb across her cheek. He’s crying and Clarke would do anything to stop it. She would do anything if it meant never seeing him unhappy again. She would do anything to keep him safe, to keep him here. His chest is heaving and his hand slides down cheek to her neck and suddenly his lips are on hers. Her fingers drift to his curls and his hands slide down her back. 

Their kiss tastes like tears.

It tastes like sorrow. 

It tastes like hope.

Slowly they part and Clarke buries her face in Bellamy’s chest and he kisses the top of her head. He rubs her back with one hand and smooths her hair down with the other. “You’re okay.” He repeats. But, even he isn’t sure who he’s talking to this time.


End file.
